Louder Than Life 2019 Bag Policy

Alright, folks, let's talk about something that's as inevitable as your Aunt Karen showing up at family gatherings - the bag policy at Louder Than Life 2019. Now, I know what you're thinking, "Bag policy? That sounds about as exciting as watching paint dry." But stick around, because we're about to make this as interesting as trying to explain the plot of "Inception" to your grandma.

What's the Deal with Bags?

So, you're heading to Louder Than Life, and you've got more stuff than Mary Poppins' magical carpetbag. You've got your sunscreen, your snacks, your secret stash of glow sticks (don't judge, we all have our festival essentials). But hold on there, partner. The folks at Louder Than Life have a few rules about what you can and can't bring in. It's like when your mom used to check your backpack for contraband on the way out the door for school.

Size Matters

First things first, let's talk size. You're not trying to smuggle in a mini-fridge full of craft beer, are you? (Well, maybe you are, but let's face it, that's not happening.) The bag you bring has to be smaller than 18" x 14" x 6". That's about the size of a small toddler, or a large cat. You know, something you can easily carry around without looking like you're smuggling a small person or a very confused feline.

Now, I know what you're thinking, "But I've got so much stuff! How am I supposed to fit it all in a bag that size?" Well, let me tell you, it's like playing a real-life game of Tetris. You've got to get creative. Roll your clothes, use those little packing cubes, and for the love of all that's holy, leave the kitchen sink at home.

What's Allowed, What's Not

Alright, so you've got your bag size figured out. Now let's talk about what you can and can't bring in. It's like the Festival Police have drawn a line in the sand, and you've got to know which side of that line your stuff falls on.

Allowed: The Good Stuff

First, let's talk about the good stuff. You're allowed to bring in two factory-sealed water bottles, up to 20 oz each. That's like having your own personal hydration squad, ready to keep you going all day long. You can also bring in sunscreen, a blanket, and even a poncho. Because let's face it, the weather at festivals can be as unpredictable as your ex's mood swings.

And here's a fun one - you're allowed to bring in a single, unopened package of glow sticks or glow toys. So go ahead, channel your inner raver. Just remember, no glow stick swords. (Yes, that's a real rule. No, I don't know why either.)

Not Allowed: The Bad Stuff

Now, let's talk about the bad stuff. You know, the stuff that's going to get you that disappointed look from the Festival Police, like when you told your mom you'd cleaned your room, but really, you just shoved everything under the bed.

First up, no outside food or drinks. That means no sneaking in your grandma's famous potato salad, or your secret stash of energy drinks. It's like they've got a sixth sense for this stuff, like they can smell the contraband a mile away.

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And here's a big one - no coolers. I know, I know, you were really looking forward to your ice-cold craft beer. But the Festival Police have spoken, and coolers are a no-no. It's like they've got a personal vendetta against your thirst.

Now, I know what you're thinking. "But what about my fancy new camping chair? The one with the built-in cooler and cup holder?" Well, I've got some bad news for you, buddy. Chairs with built-in coolers are also on the no-fly list. It's like they're trying to make your life difficult. (Spoiler alert: They kind of are.)

What About the Rest?

Alright, so we've covered the big stuff. But what about everything else? Well, folks, it's a bit of a mixed bag (pun intended). You're allowed to bring in a small backpack or bag, as long as it's not too big. But no large bags, no coolers, no camping chairs with built-in coolers. It's like they're playing a game of bag whack-a-mole, and you're trying to figure out which bags are safe and which ones are going to get you a stern talking-to.

And here's a pro tip for you - if you're not sure about something, it's always better to leave it at home. The last thing you want is to get to the gate, only to have the Festival Police tell you that your bag of questionable items isn't allowed. It's like getting grounded on the first day of summer vacation.

So, What's the Moral of the Story?

Alright, folks, let's wrap this up. The bag policy at Louder Than Life is like the Festival Police's way of saying, "We want you to have a good time, but we also want you to play by the rules." It's like when your mom said you could have a sleepover, but only if you promised to clean your room afterwards. (Okay, maybe that's a stretch. But you get the idea.)

The moral of the story? Read the bag policy. Know what you can and can't bring in. And if you're not sure, leave it at home. Because the last thing you want is to get to the gate, only to have to turn around and go back home. Trust me, nobody wants that. Except maybe your mom, who's been trying to get you to clean your room for years.

So, go forth, festival-goers. Pack your bags (the right ones), follow the rules, and most importantly, have a blast. Because at the end of the day, that's what Louder Than Life is all about. And who knows? Maybe next year, they'll finally let you bring in that mini-fridge full of craft beer. (But probably not.)