Pitts Funeral Home Obituaries Milwaukee Wisconsin

Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to spin about the most unusual obituaries I've ever laid my eyes on. Now, don't go getting all somber on me, this isn't one of those tear-jerker stories. No, no, this is a tale of laughter, of quirkiness, and of the great state of Wisconsin.

Enter: Pitts Funeral Home

Now, I know what you're thinking, "Funeral home? Really? This guy's got a weird sense of humor." Well, hold onto your cheeseheads, because things are about to get a whole lot stranger.

Picture this: You're scrolling through the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, minding your own business, and suddenly, you stumble upon the obituary section. Now, I don't know about you, but I've always found obituaries to be a bit...dry. You know, the usual suspects - "Beloved husband, father, and retired accountant, John Doe, passed away peacefully in his sleep." Snore fest, right?

But then, you see it. A headline that makes you do a double-take. A headline that says, "I Told You I Was Sick." And suddenly, you're not just reading an obituary, you're reading a comedy sketch. Welcome to the world of Pitts Funeral Home obituaries, Milwaukee.

Meet the Mastermind

Now, who's the mad genius behind these hilarious eulogies? None other than the one and only, Paul Hayes, the funeral director at Pitts Funeral Home. This guy's got a sense of humor that could make a statue laugh. He's been writing these obituaries for years, and let me tell you, he's got a knack for it.

But Paul's not just a funny guy, he's a smart one too. He knows that obituaries are more than just a way to announce a death. They're a chance to celebrate a life. And boy, does he celebrate!

Obituary | GREGORY L MORRIS of ALIQUIPPA, Pennsylvania | Pitts Funeral Home

Obituaries: The Comedy Hour

So, what makes these obituaries so darn entertaining? Well, let me give you a little taste.

There was the time Paul wrote, "If you want to send flowers, please do so in the form of a large pizza. (But not from Godfather's, we all know how he felt about that place.)" I mean, who needs a stuffy old funeral when you can have a pizza party?

Or how about the time he wrote, "She was a member of the Red Hat Society. If you don't know what that is, ask your grandmother. She'll know." I mean, come on, that's comedy gold!

And then there was the time he wrote, "He was a lifelong Brewers fan. He was also a lifelong smoker. We're pretty sure he's in heaven right now, arguing with St. Peter about the designated hitter rule." I'm laughing just typing this!

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Surprising Facts

Now, you might think these obituaries are just a bit of fun, but they're actually serving a bigger purpose. They're helping to break down the taboo around death. Paul's not afraid to talk about the elephant in the room, and people appreciate that.

But here's a surprising fact for you: these funny obituaries are also helping to raise money for charity. That's right, folks. Paul donates a portion of the proceeds from these obituaries to various charities. So, not only are they making people laugh, they're making a difference too. Now that's what I call a win-win!

So, What's the Moral of the Story?

Well, folks, the moral of the story is this: life's too short to be boring. And death's no reason to stop the party. So, the next time you're feeling down, or you're struggling to find the humor in life, remember the words of Paul Hayes: "I told you I was sick." And then, go out there and make 'em laugh.

And who knows, maybe one day, you'll find yourself in one of Paul's obituaries. Now wouldn't that be a hoot?